You’ve probably been called “too nice.”
Or maybe “accommodating.” “Supportive.” “Adaptable.”
But deep down, you know what’s really going on.
You're not being kind.
You're being strategic.
Because being yourself has cost you before.
In today’s episode of Daily Power Boost, we’re peeling back the mask of people-pleasing and naming it for what it truly is:
Identity-buffering, the nervous system’s clever way of trading authenticity for approval.
It’s not just about boundaries.
It’s about self-concept.
When you shape-shift to stay liked, safe, or needed; you don’t just betray your values…
You blur your own clarity.
Because every time you show up as the version of yourself that fits…
You silence the version of yourself that’s free.
In This Episode:
How “being liked” becomes an addiction to external regulation
The 3 signs you’re buffering instead of bonding
What your inner child has to do with your leadership mask
How to stop trading truth for safety
✦ Reflection Prompts
Where am I still performing the version of me that gets approval?
What am I afraid might happen if I stop being “easy to be around”?
What would change if I believed that clarity creates true connection?
✦ Action Steps
Name the Buffer Version
Give a name to the persona you perform. The smooth talker. The fixer. The peacekeeper.
This brings awareness and separation.Clarify Your Cost
Write down a time you buffered and it drained you. What did you lose? (Energy, time, truth, self-trust?)Say One Honest Thing
In your next conversation, speak one thing that feels true, not just nice. Start small, but real.
✦ Bonus Resources
Book a No-cost Inner Potential Discovery Call
If you’ve been performing connection instead of living in your full clarity, this is your moment.
✦ On the Next Episode:
Not Everyone Deserves Access to the Version of You That Cost You Everything to Become
Because boundaries aren’t rejection, they’re sacred self-stewardship.
✦ Move deeper with me:
Share this with someone who’s still overthinking their next step.
Subscribe to Daily Power Boost for rhythm-based identity shifts.
Join the R.E.A.L. Mastery™ Hub: http://realmasteryhub.com
Message me to apply for Beyond the Boost live coaching sessions.
✦ Engage With Me Online
Instagram: @coachshawnmichael
TikTok: @coachshawnmichael
YouTube: @coachshawnmichael
LinkedIn: @coachinguatemala
✦ References & Influences:
Harriet Lerner, The Dance of Connection - on authentic dialogue and the cost of niceness
Toko-pa Turner, Belonging - on exile, approval addiction, and self-remembrance
Brené Brown - on courage, belonging, and the risk of authenticity
Stephen Porges - Polyvagal theory and how social safety is shaped in the body
Quantum Human Design - Why Generators buffer their truth when their Sacral response is ignored
Steve Hardison - On showing up as “The Ultimate Coach” by embodying internal truth, not external optics
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